Can You Help Me Break A Pattern?
The question I’m asked a lot is, ‘Can you help me break a pattern that really ingrained or embedded in the way I do things or the way I see the world?’ Yes. I can. A coach, an outside bold voice can break through our little eggshells or bubbles that we put ourselves in, even in our success. We do hide a little bit behind these patterns everything, yes everything you do is based on a set of beliefs. Now that sounds pretty obvious, right? If I believe something then I’m going to go in the direction of that belief. However, most of us are unaware of some of our beliefs. We might know some of them we might even be working on them for 25+ years. Especially those universal beliefs like ‘I’m unworthy’ or ‘I have to be better than the next person’ or ‘there’s no room in this particular world of business or this niche or whatever it is for me’ and ‘who do I think I am?’
These beliefs create a pattern – you’re weaving a perspective that’s very hard to break through so sometimes you chip away at it but what I found is if you can narrow it down – and I think most of us get stuck because we’ve sort of caught our shoe on a nail, so to speak of a particular belief that’s not working for us. And we get stuck there.
For example, one that I worked on myself was “I couldn’t manage money.” I don’t know maybe it’s from childhood you know that doesn’t really matter but it is a clear pattern in my life.
Even though the evidence is contrary – I managed three and four million dollar budgets, I was in charge of many aspects of funding and budgeting and I had no problems with it. But I had certain areas in my life where I still felt challenged around money. Then someone said to me “With a belief like that – I can’t manage money – why would you want to bring money into your life when you can’t manage it? Why would anybody want to bring into their life something that made them feel inadequate?”
That was the beginning for me of a bold new way of looking at patterns and looking at what’s the truth here. Most of us live in a very black-and-white world and patterns are usually about believing that something is black or white – at either end of the spectrum with when the truth generally falls very much in the gray – the middle of the spectrum. When it comes to shifting perspectives we need to see the whole picture – I’m sometimes good with money and sometimes not – and how can you move towards looking at that in an integrated way so now my belief is, “I am really good with money. I managed it in my life” and I seem to produce it very easily.
