I have a bee in my bonnet as my grandmother used to say. Why do we reinforce the idea that coaching in front of others or in an assessment space is hard, nerve-wrecking and stressful? The more we say this, the more we believe it to be true but what else is possible?
Well, first of all, we can manage it, take control, be in self-command mode. The biggest obstacle to coaching mastery is fear. The word “fear” seems negative, something to avoid but we can learn from it if we understand what the fear is about and leverage it to learn.
In my experience as a coach, trainer and mentor, there are two common fears that coaches experience when earning a credential – the fear of failure and fear of rejection.
When I failed a few recordings on the way to my MCC, I had to face these fears, get some coaching around them, and come to the realization that I am brave. I am courageous. I can look at my fears in the face and see the faulty nature of them. When I did, I submitted the recording that earned me this masterful level of coaching.
Business coach, TC North, PhD, suggests a 6-step solution to come to grips with your fear:
- Identify your fear.
- Embrace your fears – pushing it away or ignoring it doesn’t help nor does judging yourself for being afraid.
- Separate yourself from your fears; You are not your fears. You are so much more.
- Understand your worst-case scenario. What do I think will happen if your fear is realized?
- Reality check in. What’s the likelihood of your worst-case scenario actually happening?
- Have a fearless focus. Once your fear is under control, you can set it aside and use the energy to create the reality you want
If you remember why you wanted to coach – to help people, to fulfil your purpose, to change the world for the better – you’ll soon realize all these goals take grit and courage. In fact, you could not even dream of coaching if you didn’t have what it takes to be a masterful coach.
